Disappointment–
I don’t deal with it well, not well at all.
For me I know it stems from years and years upon disappointment with my father. The missed birthdays, the wrong gifts, the broken promises, the un-obligatory feeling he radiates from this actions.
Expectations have a way of setting themselves, and even when we lower them to what we think is an acceptable level. It’s only a matter of time before we are disappointed when things fall below that. I sometimes can’t believe the amount of effort, or lack of some people have with it comes to certain things, like dates, or gifts, or birthdays, or thanks you. I am more let down by the effort, that causes the disappointment. If I try my hardest or if someone else does, and things don’t end up quite right, then I don’t have a problem with anything. You just chalk it up, and celebrate an awesome effort. You always can’t win and nor can you have everything you want.
I know and completely understand and accept that. It’s the lack of effort that is so overwhelming poor, that’s when disappointment hurts me the most. It’s when you have WEEKS to prepare, and your efforts seem rushed and THOUGHTLESS, it’s when you ask for one thing, and get nothing remotely close, to what you wanted, when someone has means of make it available, it’s when you emulate what’s already been done for you, because you can’t come up with anything Creative on your on, or even attempted t0– that’s when disappointment hurts the most.
I just don’t understand how you can drop the ball on some of the most important days, when it’s your last chance to make things right, when it’s a chance to make someone you love feel loved, when it’s a day that’s important to them for whatever reason. The fact is ,the excuses make the disappointment that much more stronger. Somehow their validation of their LACK of effort, makes the disappointment wound sting even more, because somehow they think it’s okay to explain why they didn’t go the extra mile for you, hell, when didn’t make the 1st mile at all.
People like my mom have to do double duty, to overshadow the whimsical attempts of my father . Thank God I have really good friends that know me, than can catch the slack for other people, who spew nothing but excuses for their inadequacies, that been said, IF those people even recognize their shortcomings.
Run-ons and jumbled… yeah yeah i know… Just read the words..
Filed under: Emotions, Justin's Life, Life, Love, People, Rants, family | Tagged: disappointment
Nice blog. It was nice going through it and learning about the disappointment. keep it up the good work.
You stay dissappointed. No one is perfect. You think everyone is supposed to be like you. You wine and you complain, when people do as much as they can do with what they have to work with.
Get over yourself. Your living, you have those GREAT WONDERFUL people you call FRIENDS. You’ll find out who your friends are when your gone, and YOU may need a little help, a little hug to get you through the day.
Remember that in future. I did.
Su, Thanks for stopping by the blog
Scott,
Being disappointed has nothing to do with being perfect, or people failing to be perfect. We all gauge disappointment by expectations. I wouldn’t expect person X to do the same for me as person Y. It comes down to personal expectations.
Why does my mom do 10times that of my Dad. Both are parents, both of who love me. The contrast causes disaapointment.
Thanks for stopping by the blog.
Being disappointed has a lot to do with who your are surrounded by. I’ve been surrounded by great people, as well as user and just people who want what they can get out of me. I had one outstanding person, but, I was that dissapointment to that person. I never had a real father…he left me at 10. I had another father and mother that just did for me gave me money bought me whatever I wanted. That never made anything right. At the time, I was young and i just enjoyed it. Now I think about it a lot.
At least you have a father. I have my Mom and My Sisters, thats all. Guess thats all i really need. Seems like at times im turning into the sorry ass real father I had. I hope not.
Sad…..
Justin,
I just wanted to say nice blog btw. I like this post because I to have a hard time with let downs. I agree it does hurt bad with you expect one thing and something else happen. It’s a total buzz-kill and makes you feel shitty.
The best I’ve learn in how to deal with it is, to think of it not as a let down, but a trial and error. You gotta give the person another chance.
Sara